Journaling

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Last night I spent a long time flipping through an old journal and remembering where I’ve been.  Reading the old memories and the old prayers helps me see how far I’ve come and how far I have yet to go.  The journal I read last night contains some of the most important moments of the past five years of my life.  It holds memories from the year I lived in Texas and the months preceding my wedding, my first year of marriage and the beginning of my work at Beeson.  I scribbled countless prayers, scripture verses and endless musings in those pages.  Sometimes I laughed.  Other times I cried.  But I always wrote to remember.

I’m ashamed to admit that I have a bad habit of losing my train of thought when I pray.  I start my silent prayers with good intentions but before I know it, I’m chasing rabbits down overgrown paths, and I forget not only what I was praying for but also that I was even praying to begin with.  Even worse, sometimes I forget the things that I pray about, and I have no way of knowing when God has answered my prayers.  I began writing my prayers down the summer after I graduated from high school.  I had kept a diary since the fifth grade, but that summer, something shifted in my relationship with God, and I began to write to him.  My diaries grew up with me, and they became journals, a written record of my spiritual life.

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